#16: late summer thoughts
For the last couple of years, I’ve been finding traditional techniques in art much easier to immerse myself into than digital. When I started learning to draw, I used Procreate a lot and I miss it. It meant that I would draw all the time and produced much more work creating digitally. But now the infinite options of pencils and colours, endless chances to fix imperfections don’t work in my favour. I rarely end up finishing a digital illustration. It really feels like a constant blank canvas and I admire the illustrators that can tackle it. The limitations that are created with traditional mediums feed into the work and give me the satisfaction of making happy mistakes.
I wonder why creativity is seen as inaccessible, written off as a ‘natural’ ability that only some possess, when there are so many ways to create. I see it as more of a skill that takes work and receptivity, rather than an innate trait. Like any other muscle, it needs to be used and like other skills, it takes time and perseverance. My partner Sai is the most creative person I know. He holds a genuine curiosity and earnestness, and devotes time towards his interests. He isn’t afraid of being bad at something initially because he has a true joy for learning, including when no one is watching and without a need for external validation. Whether that is science, languages, music, photography, bookbinding, being able to witness this kind of pure sincerity has made me realise how much the right people and environment can bring creativity out of you.
Social settings tend to reward the loudest and fastest, which is the opposite of what a slow and intentional creative practice offers. I struggle a lot with this, it’s easy for me to get caught up in having to prove myself. I’m always on edge and deeply frightened of being misunderstood. I hope to be more like Sai who, often unnoticed, owns his pace, holds genuine kindness and is less concerned by social validation.
We are in late summer now and there are many things I won’t miss about this season. One of them is the bindweed that takes over our garden in this weather. I tried to follow my curiosity here and explore this feeling of gardening through a very short hand-drawn, frame by frame animation. I have played with this in Procreate before but I really love a squiggly analog animation and wanted to attempt one. Seeing Kohana Wilson’s process really helped to demystify animation. Regardless of the outcome, I enjoy any activity that will switch my brain off and drawing ~60 frames did just that.
Animation is so astounding to me. We watched Adam Elliot’s stop motion animation, Mary and Max, months ago and it hasn’t left my mind. It tells the story of an anxious girl and an autistic man who become unlikely pen pals. It’s so poignant and atmospheric and also so funny. Last week, we managed to catch Kiki’s Delivery Service in IMAX which was such a treat. This film and its delicate and hopeful portrayal of burnout and creativity always moves me.
This summer has been a long game of hide and seek with the heat. I’m savouring the current anticipation of autumn being within reach. As always I really want to relish my favourite time of year when it does arrive. If I can enter autumn with a fraction of the sincerity and earnestness that I get to witness everyday, I’ll be pleased.
“The most regretful people on earth are those who felt the call to creative work, who felt their own creative power restive and uprising, and gave to it neither power nor time.”
